Monday, March 31, 2008
What is my "Identity"?
Sundays became "Sandais"(meaning fights) to me these days. So what happened yesterday was, I and G were talking something on not-so important topics. When it stroke the how life has changed since marriage topic, we somehow got to talk about 'identity'. So was I telling him I'd love to be identified as I am- just the plain I am, whatsoever people call me as, let that be w/o G; or Mom of XYZ etc., He comfortingly smiled at me and exclaimed, " If you do not pronounce yourself as Deepa Gowthaman in the airport, you will not even be allowed to board a plain without any pain darling". You are not identified there for your character, attributes, intellect. Just for the name Deepa followed by Gowthaman. I call upon the attention of our Government - pls do something for this. I dont want to be treated this partially. 'But I know this is reality'!!!
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4 comments:
Not really. Its up to you to create your identity. Most women I know these days opt to keep their maiden names including me. Its not just the name. So long as we as women subconsciously accept being treated as objects rather than as individuals we will have this issue.
Your post triggered so many feelings in me. Hopefully will post something on that soon.
@ Laksh:Yes Laksh, When I was a spinster I was D/o Madhu, when I got married I became Mrs.Gowthaman, Have I been treated as just Deepa- the plain Deepa, I wonder?
I think we create our identities - how we want to be identified. Till today, in forms, I refuse to write my husband's name (not out of disrespect) and just my dad's name, cos in my mind, then I am being treated as an equal - everyone, whether a man or a woman, is required to write their dad's name, is my logic. It might be a lil skewed (why dad's name and why not mom's name, you might ask) - but to me at some level there is equality :)
@A-Kay, thank you so much A-kay for visiting. But you threw some light also, now 'why not mom's name'. why not my name the last name of my Child...
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